NFL Week in Review - Week 1 (2019)
Welcome, one and all, to the Week in Review 2019! Let the madness continue!
Well... This season’s off to a banging start!
The NFL chose to start off this season with the league’s oldest rivalry in honor of NFL 100, rather than the traditional Kick Off with the defending champs. Probably want to rethink that for Year 150.
Save for one classic Discount Double Check bomb to Marquez.Valdes-Scantling Von Whodat in the second, there was little to no offense on either side, culminating in a 10-3 sleep aid. While the Packers offensive woes could confidently be laid at the feet of Khalil “Still Laughing, Chucky” Mack and co, Mitch Trubisky’s flatline (26 for 45, 228 yds, 1 INT, QBR of 18.5) isn’t so reliably blamed on an improved Packer D’. When he wasn’t going high and wide, his receivers helped him out by letting his passes bounce off their hands (with the sole exception of Allen Robinson).
Maybe rethink that whole “Five snaps in the preseason” thing next, guys!
Also the “Rush only 15 times - including ZERO for Tarik Cohen - in a game where you were never more than one score down” thing
Coming into this game, the major narratives were:
The answers were:
Christian “They’re really trying to call him ‘Run CMC’” McCaffrey carried the workload for Carolina, 128 and 2 TDs on the ground along with 10 catches for 81 yards. Defacto WR1 DJ Moore had 7 for 76.
The Panthers looked flat and lifeless during the first half and their second half rally just wasn't enough. Granted, this was a Week 1 game vs. one of the NFC's heavyweights. But Carolina is gonna either need Cam to turn back into Superman or for several somebodys to step up and help McCaffrey.
This is it! This is the season the Browns 2: Electric Boogaloo make the break through! Baker Mayfield is going to make that next step to true superstardom! First possession: RIGHT DOWN THE FIELD FOR A TD! THIS IS IT, Y’ALL!! ALL HAIL THE BROW... Oh, wait..
Forgot the O=line was a big ol’ question mark coming in. A question that got bigger when LT Greg Robinson got ejected for kicking a Titan in the head.
And Mayfield threw three bad INTs in the second half.
And they absolutely COULD NOT STOP Derrick Henry.
Mayfield looked solid when he had time. When he didn’t: Bad things man.
TL;DR: Browns Gonna Brown.
The Jags seemed to be keeping pace with the Chefs until Nick Foles’ inevitable exit¹. Unfortunately for the Jags, that exit was in the middle of the first quarter.
Gardner Minshew² - COME ON DOWN!
There’s the lamb. Cue the slaughter.
The reigning MVP, Patrick Mahomes, threw for 378 and 3TDs, all to Sammy Watkins. He was so dominant, people are giving him a pass on his airballing a no-look pass to a wide-open Travis Kelce.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZpohUjzR99U
The news wasn’t all rosy for the Chefs: Tyreek Hill caught them karmic hands left early with a clavicle injury.and will miss Week 2 at a minimum.
Meanwhile, the Jags set a fifth-rounder to Pittsburgh for third stringer Joshua Dobbs (whom I swore they converted to WR), to serve as Minshew's backup.
If this is what happens when the Dolphins compete honestly, what horror will they unleash when they do embrace the inevitable?
After unloading everyone they could get away with before they’d force Roger Goodell to step in, the Fish opened the season hosting a Baltimore team fully transitioned from Joe Flacco to Lamar Jackson. And they got dunked on. #MixedSportsMetaphor
Jackson finished his day with 324 yards and 5 TDs, including two bombs to rookie Marquise “I’m ‘Hollywood’, not ‘Antonio’s Cousin’” Brown. RGIII (Yes, he’s still there) stepped in for mop-up duty and tacked on his own TD pass. Mark Ingram, clearly relishing his role as undisputed lead back, rewarded that faith with 107 yards and 2 TDs on 14 carries.
The Ravens' D did Ravens D things: 3 sacks, 3 turnovers (1 fumble, 2 INTs) and 12 QB hits.
The rest of the AFC North should be very concerned.
When a QB only throws the ball 11 times in a game, it means one of three things: He sucked, he got hurt, or he didn’t need to do more.
Unfortunately for the Dirty Birds, it was the latter.
Kirk Cousins let Dalvin Cook (21-111, 2 TDs) and the Viking defense (3 turnovers, held ATL scoreless for three quarters) do the heavy lifting.
Not much more to say: This was a good ol’ fashioned “behind the woodshed” whoopin’.
Much like the Browns, the Jets come into 2019 looking to take that next big step with a young QB (in this case, last year's #3 overall, Sam Darnold).
And much like the Browns, that first step ended in a big ol' faceplant. The Jets blew a 16-0 third quarter lead, helped along by CJ Mosley (who was mostly responsible for saod 16-0 lead leaving the game with a groin injury. The Bills scored their first points of the game after Mosley left.
I'm sure that's just a coincidence.
Le'veon Bell carried 17 times for 60 yards in his Jets debut. Jamison Crowder set a dubious record with 14 catches for 99 yards: The most receptions ever without breaking 100 yards.
For the first time in his Hall-of-Fame In Waiting career, Adrian Peterson was a healthy scratch vs. the Eagles. The word was that Jay Gruden wanted to give as much PT to second year RB Derrius Guice (10-18 rushing, 3-20 receiving) and Wendell Smallwood (no touches).
The Racial Slurs spent the first half looking that that was a fair decision, and the second looking like that was a really bad idea. With Guice (and Chris Thompson) unable to churn away the yards and eat clock. And with Guice going down with an ankle, looks like that decision has mercifly been taken out of Gruden’s hands.
Desean Jackson, in his first game back in an Eagles uniform, torched his old, unmissed team with 8 catches for 157 yds and two scores. Carson Wentz was 28 of 39 for 313 yards, with a third TD to Alshon Jeffrey.
Not that the Fucksnyders had a monopoly on fuckery this week: The Eagles fans were up in arms because they thought a coffin at a Washington tailgate (someone brought their grandfather’s casket for “one last tailgate”) had a Sean Taylor jersey draped over it. Which would’ve been some classless ish. If that’s what it was. It wasn’t: It was actually a small banner that said “1991” (The last time the Racial Slurs won a playoff game). This would’ve been a blip on the fandom radar. Except for the fact that Sixers forward Mike Scott was at that tailgate. And he WAS wearing a Sean Taylor jersey (He’s known to be a big Racial Slurs fan). And he got into a scuffle with several Iggle fans who didn’t appreciate one of “theirs” wearing an enemy uniform (And were dumb enough to get into with a 6’ 7” man who some of the fans clearly recognized)
Stay classy, Philly!
This was not a good week for Melvin Gordon.
First San Diego Los Angeles laid down the law on Gordon’s holdout - sayign not only would there be no more negotiations this season, but he could feel free to seek trade offers.
Then his replacement, Austin Eckler, had a career-high 153 and 3 TDs, including the game winner in overtime. Justin Jackson added 57 on 6 carries, just to add insult to injury.
Jacoby Brissett, in his first game as the regular starter, was solid (21/27, 190, 2 TDs). Adam Vinitieri was not (1/3 on FGs, 1/2 XP)
This game was most notable for who wasn’t there. AJ Green was out with an injury. Doug Baldwin retired. Earl Thomas is in Baltimore.
John Ross III stepped in admirably for Green, catching seven balls for 158 yards and 2 TDs. Rookie DK Metcalf looked solid as Baldwin’s heir apparent (4-89). Earl Thomas.. Was missed (Andy Dalton had 418 yards and 2 TDs on 35 for 51 passing.)
And, real talk: Cincy got robbed of a last chance via a bad fumble call (and worse replay confirmation)
Picture it: 1:10 to go in overtime. 4 and 7 on your own 46. Do you go YOLO and run the fourth down play. Or do you punt and play for the tie (Still giving your opponent a minute to get in field goal range).
If you are Kliff Kingsbury - OFFENSIVE GENIUS... You punt.
Fortunately for him, the opponent was Matt Patricia and Matt Stafford: 7 yard gain, 12 yard gain, 9 yard loss (sack), spike, incomplete, Delay of Game (-5), incomplete.
Yeah, given what a tire fire the Cardinals were last year, a tie isn’t that bad, consdiering.
But COME ON, MAN! You suck!!! Go for the win. It’s not like the loss will hurt you in the long run. You ain’t making the playoffs.
That. That right there. That was 60 mintes and nearly 500 yards of pure FUCK SCOTT LINEHAN! Deep shots! Play action! Roll outs! Things Linehan avoided like they were against his religion. AND THEY WORKED. Dak Prescott had a career-high 405 yards and 4 TDs, hitting seven different receivers. Michael Gallup and Amari Cooper combined for 13 catches for 264 yards. Zeke Elliott, fresh from getting PAID, split carries with Tony Pollard, gaining 53 yards and 1 TD on 13 carries.
The Giants helped the cause by only 15 touches for Saquon Barkley (11/120 rushing, 4/19 receiving).
Yeah, it was Week 1 vs. a trash opponent. I will fucking take it!
Jimmy Garapolo owes Jameis Winston big time. If not for Rapey McCrablegs three-INT, two Pick 6s trash fire of a day, people might be talking more about how less than optimal Jimmy G’s day was (Garoppolo had 18 of 27 for 166, 1 TD, 1 INT.) They also had touchdowns negated by penalties on back-to-back plays.
But Round 1 of Jameis’ Last Stand masked most of that.
FYI: Winston still became Tampa’s career passing leader with this performance. Tells you all you need to know about the Bucs’ QB history, doesn’t it?
The game that ordinarily would’ve been the season opener was bumped to Sunday Night.
At least this game made the Pats fans happy.
Captain Deflater became the fourth player in NFL history to be with the same team for 20+ seasons (joining Jason Hanson, Darrell Green and Jackie Slater).. He also spent the entire game proving Antonio Brown would be a luxury, not a necessity ¹. With Josh Gordon and Phillip Dorsett over the top and Julien Edleman in the short game.²Brady completed pass when he wanted, where he wanted.
The Steelers were battered on both sides of the ball. Which would usually thrill me. But Patriots.
And somewhere, Antonio Brown is nodding to himself and muttering “Told ‘ya.”
To make room for Brown, the Pats traded Demaryius Thomas to the Jets. I’m not sure how I’d feel if were Thomas, that they consider the Jets such a non-threat, they don’t mind trading with an in-division rival.
We’ve got 16 more weeks to top this game. But I think it’ll stay top 5, minimum
This one had it all, swapped big plays, last second drama, a future hall-of-famer doing what GOATS do and defensive backfields that should've been forced to walk home for what happened in those last two minutes. The Texans went ahead on a two-play, 75-yard scoring drive. Then .Ka'imi Fairbairn shanked the extra point, sending the game into Over... Oh, wait: Roughing The Kicker. Re-kick from 5 yards closer. Texans are up by one, 38 seconds left.
Which makes the missed field goal at the end of the first half come back to haunt the Saints. Or give them more ammo to bitch about the refs, who screwed them over with a bad 10-second runoff call, forcing them to settle for a 55-yd attempt.
But then the Texans decided to play a marshmallow-soft Prevent defense as if that wasn’t Breesus himself holding the ball.Thirty-six seconds later, Will Lutz lines up and nails a 58-yarder and an instant classic was in the books.
On a side note: I remain increasingly convinced Bill O’Brien is trying to get Deshaun Watson killed so he can bring in his kind of quarterback and win his way. Because Bill O’Brien is an idiot.
There might be a big time trade that went bad faster than Antonio Brown to the Raiders. But damn if I can recall it. At least with other bad trades, the player shows on the field that This Is Not Going To Work. Brown barely made past one Week 1 practice before being cut (by his request) then signing with the Patriots for half of the money he left on the table in Las Oakland.
CBS Sports has a timeline of lowlights. The final straw, which Brown seems to be jumping up and down on, was sparked by Brown Instagramming a private email from Raiders GM Mike Mayock, informing him he was being fined for missing practices. This sparked a confrontation between Mayock and Brown (in which Brown had to be restrained by Vontaze Burfict*), where he proceeded to call Mayock “a cracker, threaten to punch him in the face, then kick a football for good measure.
On a team run by adults, Brown would’ve been frog marched out of the facility and given the Keyshawn Johnson treatment*. Here? There was talk of a one-game suspension. Then the word was “No suspension; Starts Sunday.” All the while, Jon Gruden stood back and let Mayock take all the heat (like the little shitweasel I’ve always suspected he was).
And then the news came down that he had been released by the Raiders.
At Antonio Brown’s request.
And before Twitter can even fire off half the jokes they had in the chamber, the expected/feared happened and Brown was picked up by the Patriots.
Just in time for him to get sued for sexual assault.
And across the country, Steeler Nation is still laughing.
But, indeed the Raiders got the last laugh, handling the vaunted Bronco defense (no sacks for Von Miller or Bradley Chubb). Tyrell Williams, stepping in to Brown’s abandoned WR1 slot, had 6 catches for 105 yds and a TD.
Joe Flacco's Denver debut was okayL He was 21 for 31 for 268 and a TD in the loss. But the Broncos settled for field goals far too many times, not giving themselves a shot at overtaking the Raiders. Only giving Phillip Lindsay 11 carries probably didn't help
Packers 10, Dabears 3
Well... This season’s off to a banging start!
The NFL chose to start off this season with the league’s oldest rivalry in honor of NFL 100, rather than the traditional Kick Off with the defending champs. Probably want to rethink that for Year 150.
Save for one classic Discount Double Check bomb to Marquez.Valdes-Scantling Von Whodat in the second, there was little to no offense on either side, culminating in a 10-3 sleep aid. While the Packers offensive woes could confidently be laid at the feet of Khalil “Still Laughing, Chucky” Mack and co, Mitch Trubisky’s flatline (26 for 45, 228 yds, 1 INT, QBR of 18.5) isn’t so reliably blamed on an improved Packer D’. When he wasn’t going high and wide, his receivers helped him out by letting his passes bounce off their hands (with the sole exception of Allen Robinson).
Maybe rethink that whole “Five snaps in the preseason” thing next, guys!
Also the “Rush only 15 times - including ZERO for Tarik Cohen - in a game where you were never more than one score down” thing
Rams 30, Panthers 27
Coming into this game, the major narratives were:
- How would Todd Gurley and (disappointing) rookie Darrell Henderson be used?
- What would Cam look like
The answers were:
- Split time with veteran Malcolm Brown, to the tune of 14 for 97. Brown had 2 TDs along 11 for 53. Henderson had one carry for no gain.
- Cam looked... Limited: 25/38 for 239., with one INT and a backwards pass/fumble. He didn't attempt a pass for over 17 yards and ended up with -2 yards rushing.
Christian “They’re really trying to call him ‘Run CMC’” McCaffrey carried the workload for Carolina, 128 and 2 TDs on the ground along with 10 catches for 81 yards. Defacto WR1 DJ Moore had 7 for 76.
The Panthers looked flat and lifeless during the first half and their second half rally just wasn't enough. Granted, this was a Week 1 game vs. one of the NFC's heavyweights. But Carolina is gonna either need Cam to turn back into Superman or for several somebodys to step up and help McCaffrey.
Titans 43, Browns 13
This is it! This is the season the Browns 2: Electric Boogaloo make the break through! Baker Mayfield is going to make that next step to true superstardom! First possession: RIGHT DOWN THE FIELD FOR A TD! THIS IS IT, Y’ALL!! ALL HAIL THE BROW... Oh, wait..
Forgot the O=line was a big ol’ question mark coming in. A question that got bigger when LT Greg Robinson got ejected for kicking a Titan in the head.
And Mayfield threw three bad INTs in the second half.
And they absolutely COULD NOT STOP Derrick Henry.
Mayfield looked solid when he had time. When he didn’t: Bad things man.
TL;DR: Browns Gonna Brown.
Chiefs 40, Jaguars 26
The Jags seemed to be keeping pace with the Chefs until Nick Foles’ inevitable exit¹. Unfortunately for the Jags, that exit was in the middle of the first quarter.
Gardner Minshew² - COME ON DOWN!
There’s the lamb. Cue the slaughter.
The reigning MVP, Patrick Mahomes, threw for 378 and 3TDs, all to Sammy Watkins. He was so dominant, people are giving him a pass on his airballing a no-look pass to a wide-open Travis Kelce.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZpohUjzR99U
The news wasn’t all rosy for the Chefs: Tyreek Hill caught them karmic hands left early with a clavicle injury.and will miss Week 2 at a minimum.
Meanwhile, the Jags set a fifth-rounder to Pittsburgh for third stringer Joshua Dobbs (whom I swore they converted to WR), to serve as Minshew's backup.
Who had “Week 1” and “Collarbone” in the pool?
Sixth round rookie out of Washington St.
Ravens 59, Dolphins 10 (Who Are Not Tanking)
If this is what happens when the Dolphins compete honestly, what horror will they unleash when they do embrace the inevitable?
After unloading everyone they could get away with before they’d force Roger Goodell to step in, the Fish opened the season hosting a Baltimore team fully transitioned from Joe Flacco to Lamar Jackson. And they got dunked on. #MixedSportsMetaphor
Jackson finished his day with 324 yards and 5 TDs, including two bombs to rookie Marquise “I’m ‘Hollywood’, not ‘Antonio’s Cousin’” Brown. RGIII (Yes, he’s still there) stepped in for mop-up duty and tacked on his own TD pass. Mark Ingram, clearly relishing his role as undisputed lead back, rewarded that faith with 107 yards and 2 TDs on 14 carries.
The Ravens' D did Ravens D things: 3 sacks, 3 turnovers (1 fumble, 2 INTs) and 12 QB hits.
The rest of the AFC North should be very concerned.
Falcons 12 , Vikings 28
When a QB only throws the ball 11 times in a game, it means one of three things: He sucked, he got hurt, or he didn’t need to do more.
Unfortunately for the Dirty Birds, it was the latter.
Kirk Cousins let Dalvin Cook (21-111, 2 TDs) and the Viking defense (3 turnovers, held ATL scoreless for three quarters) do the heavy lifting.
Not much more to say: This was a good ol’ fashioned “behind the woodshed” whoopin’.
Bills 17 , Jets 16
Much like the Browns, the Jets come into 2019 looking to take that next big step with a young QB (in this case, last year's #3 overall, Sam Darnold).
And much like the Browns, that first step ended in a big ol' faceplant. The Jets blew a 16-0 third quarter lead, helped along by CJ Mosley (who was mostly responsible for saod 16-0 lead leaving the game with a groin injury. The Bills scored their first points of the game after Mosley left.
I'm sure that's just a coincidence.
Le'veon Bell carried 17 times for 60 yards in his Jets debut. Jamison Crowder set a dubious record with 14 catches for 99 yards: The most receptions ever without breaking 100 yards.
F*cksnyders 27, Eagles 32
For the first time in his Hall-of-Fame In Waiting career, Adrian Peterson was a healthy scratch vs. the Eagles. The word was that Jay Gruden wanted to give as much PT to second year RB Derrius Guice (10-18 rushing, 3-20 receiving) and Wendell Smallwood (no touches).
The Racial Slurs spent the first half looking that that was a fair decision, and the second looking like that was a really bad idea. With Guice (and Chris Thompson) unable to churn away the yards and eat clock. And with Guice going down with an ankle, looks like that decision has mercifly been taken out of Gruden’s hands.
Desean Jackson, in his first game back in an Eagles uniform, torched his old, unmissed team with 8 catches for 157 yds and two scores. Carson Wentz was 28 of 39 for 313 yards, with a third TD to Alshon Jeffrey.
Not that the Fucksnyders had a monopoly on fuckery this week: The Eagles fans were up in arms because they thought a coffin at a Washington tailgate (someone brought their grandfather’s casket for “one last tailgate”) had a Sean Taylor jersey draped over it. Which would’ve been some classless ish. If that’s what it was. It wasn’t: It was actually a small banner that said “1991” (The last time the Racial Slurs won a playoff game). This would’ve been a blip on the fandom radar. Except for the fact that Sixers forward Mike Scott was at that tailgate. And he WAS wearing a Sean Taylor jersey (He’s known to be a big Racial Slurs fan). And he got into a scuffle with several Iggle fans who didn’t appreciate one of “theirs” wearing an enemy uniform (And were dumb enough to get into with a 6’ 7” man who some of the fans clearly recognized)
Stay classy, Philly!
Colts 24, Chargers 30 (OT)
This was not a good week for Melvin Gordon.
First San Diego Los Angeles laid down the law on Gordon’s holdout - sayign not only would there be no more negotiations this season, but he could feel free to seek trade offers.
Then his replacement, Austin Eckler, had a career-high 153 and 3 TDs, including the game winner in overtime. Justin Jackson added 57 on 6 carries, just to add insult to injury.
Jacoby Brissett, in his first game as the regular starter, was solid (21/27, 190, 2 TDs). Adam Vinitieri was not (1/3 on FGs, 1/2 XP)
Bengals 20, Seahawks 21
This game was most notable for who wasn’t there. AJ Green was out with an injury. Doug Baldwin retired. Earl Thomas is in Baltimore.
John Ross III stepped in admirably for Green, catching seven balls for 158 yards and 2 TDs. Rookie DK Metcalf looked solid as Baldwin’s heir apparent (4-89). Earl Thomas.. Was missed (Andy Dalton had 418 yards and 2 TDs on 35 for 51 passing.)
And, real talk: Cincy got robbed of a last chance via a bad fumble call (and worse replay confirmation)
Lions 27, Cardinals 27 (OT)
Picture it: 1:10 to go in overtime. 4 and 7 on your own 46. Do you go YOLO and run the fourth down play. Or do you punt and play for the tie (Still giving your opponent a minute to get in field goal range).
If you are Kliff Kingsbury - OFFENSIVE GENIUS... You punt.
Fortunately for him, the opponent was Matt Patricia and Matt Stafford: 7 yard gain, 12 yard gain, 9 yard loss (sack), spike, incomplete, Delay of Game (-5), incomplete.
Yeah, given what a tire fire the Cardinals were last year, a tie isn’t that bad, consdiering.
But COME ON, MAN! You suck!!! Go for the win. It’s not like the loss will hurt you in the long run. You ain’t making the playoffs.
Giants 17, Cowboys 35
That. That right there. That was 60 mintes and nearly 500 yards of pure FUCK SCOTT LINEHAN! Deep shots! Play action! Roll outs! Things Linehan avoided like they were against his religion. AND THEY WORKED. Dak Prescott had a career-high 405 yards and 4 TDs, hitting seven different receivers. Michael Gallup and Amari Cooper combined for 13 catches for 264 yards. Zeke Elliott, fresh from getting PAID, split carries with Tony Pollard, gaining 53 yards and 1 TD on 13 carries.
The Giants helped the cause by only 15 touches for Saquon Barkley (11/120 rushing, 4/19 receiving).
Yeah, it was Week 1 vs. a trash opponent. I will fucking take it!
Niners 31, Bucs 17
Jimmy Garapolo owes Jameis Winston big time. If not for Rapey McCrablegs three-INT, two Pick 6s trash fire of a day, people might be talking more about how less than optimal Jimmy G’s day was (Garoppolo had 18 of 27 for 166, 1 TD, 1 INT.) They also had touchdowns negated by penalties on back-to-back plays.
But Round 1 of Jameis’ Last Stand masked most of that.
FYI: Winston still became Tampa’s career passing leader with this performance. Tells you all you need to know about the Bucs’ QB history, doesn’t it?
Steelers 3 , The Most Hated Team In The NFL 33
The game that ordinarily would’ve been the season opener was bumped to Sunday Night.
At least this game made the Pats fans happy.
Captain Deflater became the fourth player in NFL history to be with the same team for 20+ seasons (joining Jason Hanson, Darrell Green and Jackie Slater).. He also spent the entire game proving Antonio Brown would be a luxury, not a necessity ¹. With Josh Gordon and Phillip Dorsett over the top and Julien Edleman in the short game.²Brady completed pass when he wanted, where he wanted.
The Steelers were battered on both sides of the ball. Which would usually thrill me. But Patriots.
And somewhere, Antonio Brown is nodding to himself and muttering “Told ‘ya.”
To make room for Brown, the Pats traded Demaryius Thomas to the Jets. I’m not sure how I’d feel if were Thomas, that they consider the Jets such a non-threat, they don’t mind trading with an in-division rival.
Which may prove to be a fortunate thing. More on that below.
But only one catch by a tight end. Hmm...
Texans 28, Saints 30
We’ve got 16 more weeks to top this game. But I think it’ll stay top 5, minimum
This one had it all, swapped big plays, last second drama, a future hall-of-famer doing what GOATS do and defensive backfields that should've been forced to walk home for what happened in those last two minutes. The Texans went ahead on a two-play, 75-yard scoring drive. Then .Ka'imi Fairbairn shanked the extra point, sending the game into Over... Oh, wait: Roughing The Kicker. Re-kick from 5 yards closer. Texans are up by one, 38 seconds left.
Which makes the missed field goal at the end of the first half come back to haunt the Saints. Or give them more ammo to bitch about the refs, who screwed them over with a bad 10-second runoff call, forcing them to settle for a 55-yd attempt.
But then the Texans decided to play a marshmallow-soft Prevent defense as if that wasn’t Breesus himself holding the ball.Thirty-six seconds later, Will Lutz lines up and nails a 58-yarder and an instant classic was in the books.
On a side note: I remain increasingly convinced Bill O’Brien is trying to get Deshaun Watson killed so he can bring in his kind of quarterback and win his way. Because Bill O’Brien is an idiot.
Broncos 16, Laughingstocks 24
There might be a big time trade that went bad faster than Antonio Brown to the Raiders. But damn if I can recall it. At least with other bad trades, the player shows on the field that This Is Not Going To Work. Brown barely made past one Week 1 practice before being cut (by his request) then signing with the Patriots for half of the money he left on the table in Las Oakland.
CBS Sports has a timeline of lowlights. The final straw, which Brown seems to be jumping up and down on, was sparked by Brown Instagramming a private email from Raiders GM Mike Mayock, informing him he was being fined for missing practices. This sparked a confrontation between Mayock and Brown (in which Brown had to be restrained by Vontaze Burfict*), where he proceeded to call Mayock “a cracker, threaten to punch him in the face, then kick a football for good measure.
On a team run by adults, Brown would’ve been frog marched out of the facility and given the Keyshawn Johnson treatment*. Here? There was talk of a one-game suspension. Then the word was “No suspension; Starts Sunday.” All the while, Jon Gruden stood back and let Mayock take all the heat (like the little shitweasel I’ve always suspected he was).
And then the news came down that he had been released by the Raiders.
At Antonio Brown’s request.
And before Twitter can even fire off half the jokes they had in the chamber, the expected/feared happened and Brown was picked up by the Patriots.
Just in time for him to get sued for sexual assault.
And across the country, Steeler Nation is still laughing.
But, indeed the Raiders got the last laugh, handling the vaunted Bronco defense (no sacks for Von Miller or Bradley Chubb). Tyrell Williams, stepping in to Brown’s abandoned WR1 slot, had 6 catches for 105 yds and a TD.
Joe Flacco's Denver debut was okayL He was 21 for 31 for 268 and a TD in the loss. But the Broncos settled for field goals far too many times, not giving themselves a shot at overtaking the Raiders. Only giving Phillip Lindsay 11 carries probably didn't help
If Vontaze Burfict is being the voice of reason, something has gone horribly wrong.
Suspended for as long as the CBA will allow, then deactivated for the balance of the season.
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